Saturday, August 1, 2020
College Expert Advice
College Expert Advice As I was rejected from StuGo for the second year in a row, I discovered I had been wrongfully measuring my life through numbers--my football statistics, my test scores, my age, my height (Iâm short). I had the epiphany that oh wait, maybe it was my fault that I had never prioritized communication skills, or open-mindedness . That must be why I always had to be the one to approach people during my volunteer hours at the public library to offer help--no one ever asked me for it. I resolved to alter my mindset, taking a new approach to the way I lived. From now on I would emphasize qualitative experiences over quantitative skills. I felt so stupid, I knew I was capable, I could solve a Rubikâs cube in 25 seconds and write poetry, but I felt broken. I was lost, I couldnât see myself, so stuck on my mother that I fell into an âIt will never get betterâ mindset. On August 30th, 2018 my mom passed away unexpectedly. â The thought screams through my mind as I carry a sobbing girl on my back across campus in search of an ice pack and ankle wrap. She had just fallen while performing, and I could relate to the pain and fear in her eyes. The chaos of the show becomes distant, and I devote my time to bringing her relief, no matter how long it may take. I find what I need to treat her injury in the sports medicine training room. I didnât realize she would be the first of many patients I would tend to in this training room. I realize I choreograph not for recognition, but to help sixty of my best friends find their footing. The rollout plan for the iTaylor is to introduce it to the theater market. Despite knowing how to execute these very particular tasks, I currently fail to understand how to change a tire, how to do my taxes efficiently, or how to obtain a good insurance policy. A factory-model school system that has been left essentially unchanged for nearly a century has been the driving force in my educational development. Making my teammate smile even though heâs in pain. These are the moments I hold onto, the ones that define who I am, and who I want to be. For me, time isnât just seconds ticking by on a clock, itâs how I measure what matters. I finally found myself, and my mom fought for me, her love was endless. Even though I had friends, writing, and therapy, my strongest support was my mother. My goal is to use performance and storytelling to expose audiences to different cultures, religions, and points of view. Perhaps if we all learned more about each other's lifestyles, the world would be more empathetic and integrated. On the outside, I look like any smart phone, but when you open my settings and explore my abilities, you will find I have many unique features. After experiencing many twists and turns in my life, Iâm finally at a good spot. My favorite person, the one who helped me become the man I am today, ripped away from me, leaving a giant hole in my heart and in my life. The most important factor in my transition was my momâs support. She scheduled me an appointment with a gender therapist, let me donate my female clothes, and helped build a masculine wardrobe. With her help, I went on hormones five months after coming out and got surgery a year later. I know what I want to do with my life, and I know how Iâm going to get there. Learning how to wake up without my mom every morning became routine. Nothing felt right, a constant numbness to everything, and fog brain was my kryptonite. I paid attention in class, I did the work, but nothing stuck. I was six when I first refused/rejected girlâs clothing, eight when I only wore boyâs clothing, and fifteen when I realized why. When gifted dresses I was told to âsmile and say thank youâ while Spiderman shirts took no prompting from me, Iâd throw my arms around the giver and thank them. My whole life has been others invading my gender with their questions, tears signed by my body, and a war against my closet. Since then, Iâve launched a sports medicine program to provide care to the 500-person choir program. Laughter fills the show choir room as my teammates and I pass the time by telling bad jokes and breaking out in random bursts of movement. Overtired, we donât even realize weâre entering the fourth hour of rehearsal. This same sense of camaraderie follows us onstage, where we become so invested in the story we are portraying we lose track of time.
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